american idol - charleston

Tonight wasn't great. It seems to be a trend for Tuesday night auditions to be smokin' and Wednesday night's to be chokin'. I thought it was a little strange that they showed so many mediocre auditions tonight. There were over 20 people who made it to Hollywood, and they only showed us four... which would be all right if there were some hilarious rejects to fill the space. But there really weren't. I just felt sort of blah about tonight's auditions.

AI: Charleston (1/23/08)

• Crystal and Randy - GAG ME WITH A SPOON. (You like that?) These sickies need to get a room. NO PASS.
  
  
• Michelle and Jeffrey - These two were hilarious. I would love to get drunk with them - they looked like so much fun. I really loved Jeffrey's voice, and I thought that they sounded great together... but I agree with the judges in thinking that Jeffrey's talent outshone Michelle's. I just don't think she's strong enough to make it on her own. But I'm really glad the judges put both of them through... I think it would have been awful to split them up. My favorite part of the entire night was when Jeffrey just kept shouting "HALLELUJAH JESUS! HALLELUJAH JESUS!" after he got his golden ticket. PASS.
  
  
• Amy Abstinence Girl - I really didn't like much of anything about this girl. I almost puked when she said "You can call me Amy, Amy Catherine, AC... Whatevs!" She's only 16 - you know how I feel about the youngins auditioning. She was just pretty much obnoxious, shoving her morals down everyone's throat. I mean, I think it's great that she's selfless and all about abstinence... but the sample speech she would have given a teenager contemplating premarital sex? HILARIOUS. She had an okay voice, but she should have given herself a few more years to develop it before trying out. Her voice - and her personality - were just too immature. I agree with Simon - I found Amy incredibly annoying. PASS.
  
  
• London - I liked her, and I think she could be really good if she explored the bluesy part of her voice. She needs to cut out the breathy stuff after each line. Great song choice, though - Billie Holiday's "Good Morning Heartache." PASS.
  
  
• Lindsey - The Army chick. She was very nervous, but I thought her voice had potential. I do think Simon was right in saying that she sounded a little nightclub, though. I probably would have put her through to Hollywood... especially after showing a huge backstory about her. NO PASS.
  
  
• Rashad - Very Clay Aiken-like in almost every way except for skin pigment. I didn't think he was awful - he was just in the wrong place. Maybe Clay can find him a part in a Monty Python skit. NO PASS.
  
  
• Oliver - The guy whose wife had a baby during auditions. With all the screen time they gave him, I thought for sure he'd blow us all away. The judges didn't like his voice at all, though, and didn't put him through to Hollywood. He had a crazy vibrato, but I didn't hate him. After they shot him down, he introduced the judges to his new baby girl - Emma Grace. NO PASS.
  

I think I'm a little out of order with those last few recaps... but whatevs! (Thanks, Amy C!) Nothing about this night of auditions was very inspiring. Omaha is next week... I hope they find some worthwhile talent in the cornfields.

SEACREAST, OUT!