american idol - top ten men

Michael Johns - Fleetwood Mac YAY! A little rough on the edges tonight... the verses sounded nice, but the chorus was strained. The ending was cool - I dug that. I really liked the arrangement they used, too. I agree with Randy: it kinda seemed like Michael was holding back tonight. I was waiting/hoping for him to start rocking out at some point.

Jason Castro - How cute is he?! He's completely adorable. Not his best - less than desirable song choice, I think, but still decent. I think he'll be in it for a while yet, but I don't think he's strong enough (yet, anyway) to win it. As long as he keeps the guitar with him, he'll be safe.

Luke Menard - My favorite Queen song! I just think he's so weird to watch. I know they keep talking about his incredible range... but I'm just not a fan of it. He sounds nasally and constantly sharp - Randy had it right when he said whiny. Weird ending on this song tonight, but it was better than last week (not that that's a tough accomplishment!). And did I just completely miss the "Dawson's Creek" comparison Ryan tossed out?

Robbie Carrico - Kid Rock had an excellent night! I really liked this performance. I agree with Randy to a degree... Robbie didn't really pull out all the stops, but I liked him tonight a lot more than the judges did. Of the first four performances, I thought his was the best.

Danny Noriega - I hated just about everything about this performance. The only thing I liked was that the song reminded me of the scene in Tommy Boy when they're in the car and there's a montage of them singing to all the hilarious songs. I'm just totally not a fan of this guy, and I wish the judges would listen to me.

David Hernandez - Great performance, a really fun one to watch. Best one of the night so far, no question - I thought he rocked, completely. I love that Simon told him at Hollywood that he'd have to work harder than anyone to stay in this competition, and he clearly has worked harder than anyone else so far. Good for him! Side note: do you think he gets his eyebrows waxed? Cause I do.

Jason Yeager - I just can't stand watching him. All his show choir smiling creeps me out. Randy was totally right - that song is more about the instrumentation (read: rocking out) than the vocals. I'm not a fan of Jason, and I won't be surprised (or disappointed) if he's voted off this week. Frankly, I'm surprised he's still here right now. I will say that I did feel a pang of guilt for disliking him so much after Simon was so mean to him. And what was with the weird picture-in-picture type thing that the producers did when they panned away from him?

Chikezie - Great performance! Of course, there's no way he could have done any worse than last week, but this was awesome! Lots of fun to watch him looking comfortable and having a good time on stage. The banter between him and Simon after he sang was hilarious, and his intro video was really cool - interesting and entertaining. I'm a fan.

David - Word nerd?! LET ME AT HIM. I love the song he chose - one of my faves. I thought this was a really great and fun performance - his vocals were great (although I think he could have done just a little bit more to switch up the chorus every now and then), the guitar was awesome, he completely worked the crowd - just an all-around entertaining performance. DID SIMON JUST SAY THAT WORDS ARE BORING??????????????????? My ears are burning - I can't believe I just heard that. And from a British man! I completely disagree with him in that David's video didn't "do" anything for him... and I also don't think that David was trying to "point out the rules" of the competition to Simon. He was making a joke, trying to make the people laugh so they'd remember him - and they did, and I think they will. Maybe Simon needs to take a page from his own book and not be so defensive.

David Archuleta - As much as I hate to say it, that performance made me a huge David fan. That was gorgeous... brought tears to my eyes. David has been getting on my nerves so badly for the last few weeks - and all the girls screaming at him tonight didn't help that - but I'm a big enough to person to admit that that was an absolutely moving performance, and Simon was 100% right: David is now the person to beat (ughhh).

I'm saying Luke Menard and Jason Yeager will be voted out this round - but that's the same stinkin' thing I said last week.

american idol - top twelve women

Kristy Lee Cook - Sick or not, this was a totally boring opener for the show. She's really pretty, but she's so lifeless to watch... except for that weird eye thing she started doing at the beginning. I really liked her when she sang "Amazing Grace"... I kinda hope she gets the chance to show us which one of these performances was a fluke.

Joanna Borgella - Eh. Kinda on the boring side. I guess maybe I just expect more out of someone who sang at Madison Square Garden. If they're picking their own songs at this point, why didn't Joanna pick something that fit into her lower range? Totally unrelated to her performance, this girl has the most beautiful skin I've ever seen in my entire life.

Alaina Whitacker - She really has to stop doing that yodel-y thing with her voice. A pretty good performance - she should get her birthday present to stay on the show. I don't know. She's definitely not my favorite, but she did all right.

Amanda Overmeyer - This is her first performance that I haven't been completely on board with her. I love her style and the fact that she's so unique... I'll admit that I find her a little frightening... but I do like her. Just a very strange song choice, I think. Plenty of other female rock songs she could have chosen - I think she could definitely rock some Melissa Etheridge.

Amy Davis - Brutally honest... I absolutely hate her. Tonight's performance just solidified what I already knew: she's only here because Simon liked her huge cans. Even though she's from my hometown (sort of), I cannot wait for her to get the hell off this show. I really wanted to be the first person from The Region to make it on Idol - and after tonight's performance, at least I still have a chance! Bye bye, Amy.

Brooke White - First off, it's so not fair that she gets to have curly hair and bangs. That's just not supposed to work... you can't have both. Anyway, this was a little weird for me. I guess I just dislike when people scat or vamp or whatever you want to call it. The performance was a little boring for me. I really liked Brooke's other performances, though, and I hope she gets the chance to bring it up a notch again.

Alexandrea Lushington - I think she definitely has a cool voice - she probably needs to work on her higher register a little bit, but a cool sound. I don't know... it was a little strange, but she did it really well. She kinda reminds me of Lauren Hill in a way. I dug it.

Kady Malloy - This girl bores the heck out of me. She has a really nice voice, but I hate watching her. Her film tonight kinda made me think she's annoying and has a bad attitude. But that's unrelated. Her performance tonight was boring - nothing special about it. That Brittney impression is dead on, though - maybe there's a career in that.

Asia'H Epperson - I really wish they would stop showing her audition clip, because it makes me bawl every time. This girl has my complete respect for keeping it together this whole time as well as she has. Is it just me, or does she do something strange with her consonants every time? I liked this performance - I thought it was really fun. She's very comfortable and easy to watch on stage. In addition to her awesome voice, I think that's what's putting her over the top so far. So many of the other seem so uptight up there. And I really like her haircut :)

Ramiele Malubay - One of my favorite songs. A pretty nice performance from Ramiele tonight - I'd love to see what she's really got, though. I disagree with Randy - I don't think she saved her big voice for the end... at least I *hope* that's not her big voice. I think she's holding out on us. And if she's not? Well... I think she'll be leaving us before too long. But for now - she's definitely safe.

Syesha Mercado - I love her. From the beginning, she's reminded me of Stephanie (can't remember her last name - from last season). I loved Stephanie. MAN what a performance. Fun, high-spirited - just great. Love her!

Carly Smithson - You know what? I'd make out with her. Yeah. I'd probably turn momentarily gay for her if she asked me to. She was a little pitchy tonight, but she's definitely still the best female vocalist this season by far. Simply beautiful voice, wonderful performance.

I'm saying that Amy White (PLEASE GOD) and Joanna Borgella will be voted out this round.

american idol - top twelve men

Quick note: Have they always started the "theme nights" this early in the game? I thought they used to do a round or two where the contestants got to choose their own songs.

David Hernendez - I really liked the beginning and the middle... well, I really liked everything up until that second-to-last note when he lost it. Great song choice, though.

Chikezie - NICE. SUIT. I didn't feel the beginning of his song - it actually took me a bit to realize what song he was performing. He has a nice voice, though.

David Cook - My Bon Jovi man. I really liked his rendition of "Happy Together" - I agreed with Simon during the Hollywood rounds when he said that David would become too vulnerable on stage without his guitar... and I was expecting him to lose it... but I'm pleasantly surprised. I'm always rooting for the rockers, and I'm glad David brought his game.

Jason Yeager - Am I the only one who's a little bit distracted by this guy's hair? It freaks me out when he smiles so much while singing. "Moon River" is one of my favorite songs... but I can't say I was really on board with Jason's rendition. I didn't think it was particularly bad or anything, but it was very boring... and I thought it was fake. Contrived.

Robbie Carrico - He looks so much like Kid Rock that I can hardly stand it. And what is a "boy girl group"? I do like his voice, though - his Hollywood song "Hemorrhage" was awesome. Tonight's song "One" wasn't bad at all, either. I don't think it showed off enough of his voice, though. I sure am digging the doo-rag, though.

David Archuleta - Man alive, is anyone sick of this kid yet? Boring performance... he reminds me of a Disney Channel kid or something - you know? Like he should have a show where his character sings. Hook up with Hannah Montana or something. Why do the judges like him so much? Sure, he has a good voice... but there's no way he's as good as Simon proclaimed him to be. Ho hum, I can't wait till he gets voted off.

Danny Noriega - Danny has "Sanjaya" written all over him, if you ask me. Terrible performance, but his flamboyant attitude to Simon's comments was mildly amusing. Probably not a good idea to sass the judges this early on, though. I don't really follow the cutting-edge fashions... but is it "in" for guys to wear skinny jeans now, too?

Luke Menard - Whenever he walks onto the stage, I just keep expecting Kelly and Brenda to come out and give him an ultimatum or something. I sort of liked Luke before - I thought he had a chance... but this performance was awful. Even worse than Danny Noriega's. Back to the bustling metropolis that is Crawfordsville, Indiana, for you, Luke!

Colton Berry - WHY IS HE STILL HERE. After his initial audition, they should have sent him back to show choir. I can't believe that Paula and Randy aren't losing sleep over their decision to keep Colton over Kyle. And what's up with the freaky smiling?! It's like this season's theme so far. I didn't think this performance was as bad as his others - he actually showed a little non-show-tune personality tonight. I still won't be buying a ticket for the Colton train any time soon, though.

Garrett Haley - Nice try with the Ellen joke, Garrett. During his audition, I actually thought this guy was just an unfortunate-looking girl. A perfect example of a young kid who should have waited another year or two before auditioning. Just a ridiculous performance.

Jason Castro - Completely digging the dreads - huge fan. I was totally - surprisingly - impressed with his performance! I thought it was awesome that he had the guts to go out there with a guitar. Without the guitar, it would have been laughable, I think, but his take this time really worked. Very simple, but very good. He's very fun to watch - and I loved that a guy we've hardly seen at all thus far had "one of the top two performances of the night" according to Simon. Not cool - in my book - that he compared him to David Archuleta, though.

Michael Johns - Having a guy like Michael in the competition kinda makes it a waste of time for the other dudes. I love how his talent just doesn't even seem to phase him whatsoever. Completely effortless. Just totally awesome performance tonight - really, really wonderful.

I'm saying that Jason Yeager and Luke Menard will be voted out this round.

american idol - omaha

A pretty decent night for hopeful pop stars and hangers-on. There was a lot more talent in the midwest than in some of the larger cities we've seen so far - REPRESENT! Part of me was glad to see Paula return in her huge, I'm-trying-to-hide-my-hangover-eyes sunglasses and then embarrass herself several times during the auditions for which she was actually present. (Her flight was delayed or something... yeah right. Binging!) Seriously - she was hiccupping, laying all over the table with her ass in Randy's face, and jumping up in the air shouting "TOUCHDOWN!" I thought she had cleaned up her act for a while there, but now I'm not so sure.

AI: Omaha (1/29/08)

• Chris - He was kind of adorable save for the fact that he was obsessed with Kelly Clarkson more than should be socially allowed. He definitely couldn't sing, but bless his heart - he made his dream come true by auditioning, and he even showered the judges with gifts. He asked to audition for the red carpet at the finale, and Simon told him to call his Fox affiliate and say that Simon Cowell wants to see him there. I have no idea if Simon has any kind of pull over that, but if he does - awesome for Chris! NO PASS.
  
  
• Jason - The guy who forgot the words to "When You Say Nothing At All"... and for several minutes, he really did say nothing at all. Every time he sang the first line, I liked him a little bit more, and I'm really glad the judges let him retry his song four times. His voice was kind of sexy in a raspy way. PASS.
  
  
• Rachel - I really liked this girl's voice. She sang a Le Ann Womack song and did that annoying country yodel-y thing that I hate (and Randy pointed out), but her voice was beautiful. She was an arm-wrestling champ, and wanted to wrestle the judges. Paula's the only one who took her up on it, but the cameras quickly cut away from their contest, probably because hungover Paula couldn't control her noodle arm. PASS.
  
  
• Sarah - Apparently this chick was a professional wrestler? I forget the name she said she used, but wowwie wow wow... fuh-ree-kee. That laugh scared the bejeesus out of me. I was too busy rocking back and forth in the fetal position after she was done singing, and I only heard half the votes... did Paula actually say "yes"?! All I heard was Simon say "Two nos, one yes..." NO PASS.
  
  
• Samantha - This poor girl got caught up in the middle of the little fued between the judges and Ryan. Ryan wanted to know what it would be like to do absolutely nothing and get paid for it, so he and Paula switched roles. I liked Samantha's rendition of "Don't Know Why" by Norah Jones - she had a low, jazzy voice. Those are my favorite kinds of contestants... unfortunately, they don't seem to be able to stay in the competition very long. PASS.
  
  
• Elizabeth - They only showed a couple seconds of Elizabeth, but I wish they would have showed more. She sang "Heard It Through the Grapevine," and she was kickin'. PASS.
  
  
• Michael - Again, just a few seconds of this guy, but he was blonde and looked like an Abercrombie poster boy. He had a fantastic voice, though - what they let us hear, anyway. PASS.
  
  
• Angelica - They showed us her backstory about how she left home because of her overbearing father, and then she played some song for him over the phone and he paid for her to audition for Idol. Yeah - I was confused, too. Angelica sang Celine Dion's "The Power of Love," which just annoys me... I hate when people audition with Celine Dion, Whitney Houston, etc. Angelica sounded like a Celine clone, though... she really did have a great voice. And I got a little teary when Ryan called her dad on speakerphone to tell him she made it to Hollywood, and he said "She's always been my American idol." Awh! PASS.
  
  
• David - I LOVE BON JOVI. David sang "Living on a Prayer," and I was absolutely swooning. If I had a ton of expendable income, I'd pay him to follow me around all day, every day, and sing for me on command. Really fantastic voice. PASS.
  
  
• Johnny - The shiny coat guy who sang "Shout." I'm not even going to comment. NO PASS.
  
  
• Leo - Made the judges laugh with his joke about being his town's homecoming queen. Right away, I liked Leo - he seemed like an honest and unassuming guy. He sang "A Song for You," and he had a wonderful voice. I loved it. I think he'll make it really far in this competition. PASS.
  

Tonight's auditions are in Miami - I hope there's someone awesome to be found in Florida. And I hope Paula gets her act together for the last round of auditions. I love the audition shows, but I'm starting to get anxious for the real competition!

SEACREST, OUT!

american idol - charleston

Tonight wasn't great. It seems to be a trend for Tuesday night auditions to be smokin' and Wednesday night's to be chokin'. I thought it was a little strange that they showed so many mediocre auditions tonight. There were over 20 people who made it to Hollywood, and they only showed us four... which would be all right if there were some hilarious rejects to fill the space. But there really weren't. I just felt sort of blah about tonight's auditions.

AI: Charleston (1/23/08)

• Crystal and Randy - GAG ME WITH A SPOON. (You like that?) These sickies need to get a room. NO PASS.
  
  
• Michelle and Jeffrey - These two were hilarious. I would love to get drunk with them - they looked like so much fun. I really loved Jeffrey's voice, and I thought that they sounded great together... but I agree with the judges in thinking that Jeffrey's talent outshone Michelle's. I just don't think she's strong enough to make it on her own. But I'm really glad the judges put both of them through... I think it would have been awful to split them up. My favorite part of the entire night was when Jeffrey just kept shouting "HALLELUJAH JESUS! HALLELUJAH JESUS!" after he got his golden ticket. PASS.
  
  
• Amy Abstinence Girl - I really didn't like much of anything about this girl. I almost puked when she said "You can call me Amy, Amy Catherine, AC... Whatevs!" She's only 16 - you know how I feel about the youngins auditioning. She was just pretty much obnoxious, shoving her morals down everyone's throat. I mean, I think it's great that she's selfless and all about abstinence... but the sample speech she would have given a teenager contemplating premarital sex? HILARIOUS. She had an okay voice, but she should have given herself a few more years to develop it before trying out. Her voice - and her personality - were just too immature. I agree with Simon - I found Amy incredibly annoying. PASS.
  
  
• London - I liked her, and I think she could be really good if she explored the bluesy part of her voice. She needs to cut out the breathy stuff after each line. Great song choice, though - Billie Holiday's "Good Morning Heartache." PASS.
  
  
• Lindsey - The Army chick. She was very nervous, but I thought her voice had potential. I do think Simon was right in saying that she sounded a little nightclub, though. I probably would have put her through to Hollywood... especially after showing a huge backstory about her. NO PASS.
  
  
• Rashad - Very Clay Aiken-like in almost every way except for skin pigment. I didn't think he was awful - he was just in the wrong place. Maybe Clay can find him a part in a Monty Python skit. NO PASS.
  
  
• Oliver - The guy whose wife had a baby during auditions. With all the screen time they gave him, I thought for sure he'd blow us all away. The judges didn't like his voice at all, though, and didn't put him through to Hollywood. He had a crazy vibrato, but I didn't hate him. After they shot him down, he introduced the judges to his new baby girl - Emma Grace. NO PASS.
  

I think I'm a little out of order with those last few recaps... but whatevs! (Thanks, Amy C!) Nothing about this night of auditions was very inspiring. Omaha is next week... I hope they find some worthwhile talent in the cornfields.

SEACREAST, OUT!

american idol - san diego

Tonight was good. Definitely good.

AI: San Diego (1/22/08)

• Tatiana - Eh. I agreed with Simon in saying that she's not as good as she thinks she is. She did have impeccable taste in song choice, though - "Someone to Watch Over Me" is my song. I do it better, though ;) PASS.
  
  
• Perrie - Could have walked right onto stage with Boyz to Men and no one would have ever known the difference. Forgive me for being crude here... but I had to change my underwear and wipe my seat as soon as he opened his mouth. I'll say it again: I love me some black men. His son was adorable - that ponytail! And "whaddup, Randy"... and when he just said "okay" when Ryan told him his daddy ("Papa") was going to Hollywood. *sigh, swoon* PASS.
  
• Michael - What a great, soulful voice. Nice accent... the girls will love him. A little like Sanjaya except Michael has talent. So... really nothing like Sanjaya. Great song choice - Otis Redding's "Loving You Too Long." PASS.
  
  
• Valerie - Oh maaaan, this girl had me cracking up. I knew as soon as she said she'd never be and American Idol reject that she most definitely would. I've never liked Mariah Carey that much... but I'd take her any day over Valerie "Oh-No-Now-I'm-Gonna-Be-On-the-Rejects!!!" Wannabe. NO PASS.
  
  
• Christopher - Sang "I Believe the Children are Our Future." Atrocious. After the lyric "Let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be," Simon said "There's not a single child laughing at that." Wrong-o! This child was cracking up. NO PASS.
  
  
• Samantha - I loved her. She sang Aretha's "Till You Come Back to Me," and she had such a gorgeous, natural voice. Completely unforced. She might be my favorite girl so far. She and Perrie should get together and have some beautiful, vocal-prodigy children. PASS.
  
  
• Blake - I didn't think he was nearly as bad as the judges evidently did. In fact, I thought he had a pretty good voice, and I probably would have put him through to Hollywood. PASS.
  
  
• Alberto - The guy with the big fan because he's a big American Idol fan. HAH! Alberto was - hands down - the strangest person I've ever laid eyes on... HE HAD FLOWERS IN HIS TOES, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. I wish I could ask him for crack-nail growing tips for my resolution. It did make me smile, though, to realize that I don't have the frizziest hair in the world. On the other hand... I did feel really badly when he cried and talked about how Simon just refused to listen to him. NO PASS.
  
  
• David - Another youngster, but I liked his voice. Great song choice - John Mayer's "Waiting on the World To Change" - made even better by Randy's half-hearted backup. I had to stifle my laughter every time he threw a "waiting!" in between each chorus line. I thought David had an interesting and inspiring story, and he seemed like a genuine guy. PASS.
  
  
• Carly - The Irish girl who made it to Hollywood in Season 5 but had Visa problems and was disqualified. A really awful story. I loved her husband - I thought his modest and fear of public opinion regarding his tattoos was endearing. Carly's voice brought tears to my eyes. I really, really, really loved her. She and Samantha are gonna have to duke it out to win my Favorite Girl of San Diego.

SEACREST, OUT!

american idol - dallas

I have to say that I was much less enthused with the Dallas auditions. Maybe Philly set the bar too high... maybe I just had a bad day and not even the crazy story about the dude and his dad with the "key" to his heart could cheer me up. But wow - that story was kinda bonkers, huh.

AI: Dallas (1/16/08)

• Alaina - I thought she had a pretty nice voice, but it was a little weak sounding. Breathy, to use a Paula-ism. I don't always like the young kids - 16, 17 - that try out... and although I do think Alaina had a nice voice, I hope she can overcome her young age. PASS.
  
  
• Pia - I really, really liked her. She sang an awesome Gladys Knight song, and her voice was deep and soulful. I hope she can stay in it for a while. She has a cool image - kind of edgy and interesting. PASS.
  
  
• Brandon - I was completely ready to dismiss this cutie after he started talking about his fingernail collection he's been peeling since high school, AND THEN ACTUALLY PULLED A ZIPLOC BAG FULL OF THEM OUT OF HIS POCKET. I'm glad I stuck with it, though - he had a pretty good voice. I'm not sure if he has what it takes to make it very far... but I definitely liked him. PASS.
  
  
• Kady - I really didn't like her at first. I thought her Britney impression was awesome, though - she sounded just like her. I found myself getting really annoyed with her really quickly... until the judges finally got her to sing like herself. She's pretty damn good. She sang a beautiful rendition of "Unchained Melody"... I only wish they would have let her go a little further. They stopped her before she hit the best note. PASS.
  
  
• Drew - A downhome country boy. He was adorable, and he sang very well. Let's make out! PASS.
  

Like I said, Dallas just didn't do it for me. There wasn't as much talent or even as much funny/horrendous auditions. Man, I hope this isn't a trend!

The guy in the cape and the feather hat definitely deserves his own paragraph, though. He was so hilarious, I swear that I almost peed myself laughing so hard. I was a little mad that the judges were teasing him so badly... but when he just. kept. going., I couldn't help myself. Simon predicted that the Brother song would be on the radio before anyone knew it... and I couldn't agree more. This dude and William Hung are soulmates. I loved you and your song about Simon, cape and feather hat dude!

ALSO! They didn't show the audition save for a few seconds before a commercial, but I CANNOT BELIEVE that two people sang a song from Rigoletto!! I thought only two people in the universe had even heard of "The Love Within Myself"... and I was one of them... and there were two people singing in that audition... so I guess I was wrong! They butchered it, but I love that song - and I was totally happy to hear it.

SEACREST, OUT!

american idol - philly

Okay, here's the thing. I love American Idol. I used to be ashamed of this fact, but somewhere around Season 5, I just decided to come out of the non-gay closet. If I was a cute little girl that Simon and Randy would love, I'd try out in a heartbeat. But, as it stands, I'm left to live vicariously through the lives of those more courageous and confident than I. And, because I'm so deluded that I sometimes actually think people want to hear my opinions, I'm going to start doing weekly recaps.

(I sort of feel like my writers are on strike, too... I want to keep blogging, but I'm kinda having a hard time writing anything touching or comedic or inspirational or entertaining. So I'm gonna go with the blogging equivalent of Celebrity Apprentice or another what-have-you of awful reality TV filler.)

AI: Philly (1/15/08)

I was so pumped before, during, and after these auditions. What a great round! We saw some wonderful talent, some hilarious rejects, and some So-Paula moments. All in all, the perfect televised audition.

• Joey - The lovable guy who lost 200 pounds before auditioning. He had an inspirational story, a great attitude, and a killer voice. I loved him. It definitely didn't hurt that he sang one of my all-time favorite songs: Maroon Five's "Sunday Morning." Sadly, I don't think he'll make it very far on the show... not unless he gets himself some confidence. PASS.
  
  
• Junot - I probably should just be honest - I love me some black men. I really do. I'd be so very happy if a gorgeous black man with a voice to die for stole the show this year. Junot could just be that show stealer. He sang Elton's "I Guess That's Why They Call it the Blues" and called it "The Blues," which was cute in a clueless sort of way, but he was most definitely awesome. PASS.
  
  
• Temptress - Was anyone else bawling before she even made it through her song? I hate it when they give you the whole back story about people, make you completely love them, and then send them packing because they end up sucking hard. Poor Temptress. I absolutely loved that the judges were so careful with her feelings and even followed her out to meet her family. Saps like me just ate this audition right up. I was crying pretty much the entire time. No shame, and... NO PASS.
  
  
• Alexis - This girl completely freaked me - and probably the majority of America - out. Between the glitter, her weird blinking habit, and that tongue thing she did at the end... I'll be having nightmares about this chick for at least a week. Oh, also: I AM GOING FOR ACTRESSING!!!!!!!!! NO PASS.
  
  
• Angela - Chicago, represent! I'd like to be friends with her and give her little girl a hug. I thought Angela had a great voice, and at first I disagreed with the judges calling her out on the snapping, "ha-s!," and whatnot... but after seeing her recap on the news about forty times this morning, I'm a believer. I still think she had a beautiful voice, and I enjoyed watching her perform... but the extras have got to go. PASS.
  
  
• Kristi Lee - I really think that only a handful of people in this world can sing "Amazing Grace" the way it was meant to be sung... and Kristi Lee is most definitely one of those people. She rocked. I loved that she sold a horse to get to the auditions, and she traveled a long way to be in Philly. I think she'll be at the top of the country females this season. PASS.
  
  
• Paul, the Paula lover - um, that was the best song of all time, if only for his incredible use of a Jimmie Walker reference. This guy is sort of my hero. I thought he was hilarious!! Of course, that may have something to do with the fact that he didn't write a stalker song about me. NO PASS.
  
  
• Chris - I cannot tell you how much I hate the song "Follow Me" by Uncle Kracker. There's just something about it that scratches at my very being like nails on a larger-than-life chalkboard. This dreadlocked honey could sing, though. (Can't believe I just wrote "dreadlocked honey.") I loved his voice, and I wouldn't be surprised if he made it pretty far in the competition. He reminded me quite a bit of Antwon from Season 4, what with being gorgeous and braided... I just hope he has better luck. PASS.
  
  
• Princess Lea Christina - I just want to know where she found REMOVABLE PRINCESS LEA BUNS. This chick and Alexis should get together for a delusional, freaky-deaky tea party or something. Christina is single-handedly doing her part to revive the word "DUH!!!!" and it kind of hurts my heart a little. NO PASS.
  

What a great start to the season - I can't wait to see what's next!

SEACREST, OUT!