Thursday, September 30, 2004

"It's okay to do what you want to do, until it's time to do what you were meant to do."

Today, for the first time, I felt like a senior.

It finally sank in. I am living my senior year of college. The idea has been tugging at me for a few weeks now... nagging in a whisper behind a folded piece of paper during lecture, lurking in the corner of the bar on Pub Night, slipping between the sheets of my twin-sized dorm room bed... but I've ignored it, pushed it aside, screamed at it to leave me alone.

Tonight, in the company of unlikely friends in a place to which I've never gone simply for the fun of it, I could no longer ignore, push, or scream the idea away. It didn't have a forceful victory, though. I didn't fight it. It was more like I accepted the idea as it washed over me and instead of focusing on the negative things being a senior entails, I saw all the positive attributes that come along with it.

I had forgotten how much fun it is to become reacquainted with an old friend... to reminisce with someone instead of by myself... to make new friends and be the center of attention... to be a part of a planning committee with qualified and enthusiastic people... to simply sit down on the living room couch and gossip with my roommates, the thought of homework and tests nowhere to be found.

I thought last year would be "my year." I felt like a senior... I was treated like a senior... people assumed I was a senior. I thought my psuedo-senior year might as well have been my real senior year, as everything I wanted to remember about college ended with the exit of the class of 2004. As is a horrible habit of mine, I was too quick to judge.

This is going to be a great year... nevermind the things and faces I'm missing... this is going to be a great year.

Today was a great day. Thanks to all who helped make it that way.

No comments: